


My One and Lonely

by negasonicteenageimagines (nostalgicstrawberry)



Category: Deadpool (Movieverse), Deadpool - All Media Types, X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: F/F, Polyamory, Post-Deadpool 2 (2018), Reader eats Ramen, Reader was abused, Telekinetic Reader, Wade Wilson is Your Best Friend, Wade Wilson is a Good Bro, reader has anxiety, reader has trauma, supportive girlfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-17
Updated: 2019-05-17
Packaged: 2020-03-07 02:35:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18863980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nostalgicstrawberry/pseuds/negasonicteenageimagines
Summary: You’ve been dating Yukio and Ellie for a while now and still feel you don’t really have a place in the relationship. Can your girlfriends convince you of the truth, in spite of your past trauma?





	My One and Lonely

“You know, you could just talk to them about it,” Wade tells you, and your fork and book fall to the ground.

“Uh, no? I literally can’t, dude. Now my fork’s dirty.”

“Uh, yeah. You literally can,  _dude_. And that’ll teach you to be lazy, using your powers for easy stuff like turning pages and eating. I bet the fork’s not that bad.”

“Like you wouldn’t do the same thing,” you scoff, and he shrugs, nodding.

“Come on. It’s totally normal for you to be feeling the way you are. They were friends and dating before you came into the picture. Insecurity’s normal. Especially considering-”

“Call me insecure one more time and I’ll use the dirty fork to show you just how insecure your  _eye’s_  placement in your  _skull_  is,” you threaten, feeling your face heat up. You didn’t like that your weakness was so obvious. Or that he reminded you of  _her_.

“Christ, maybe I really am a bad influence…Nah, we’re just birds of a feather,” Wade says with a cheeky grin you don’t know how you can see through the mask. Maybe his tone of voice makes the subtle expression more perceivable. “Sorry,” he quickly adds. “But, seriously. They’re the last people who are gonna judge you.”

“Who’s the last people that are gonna judge Y/N?” You hear from behind you. Ellie. Shit. She made you far more nervous than Yukio did. Yukio was the gentle, sensitive moon, and Ellie… Ellie was the sun. Nuturing, yes, but scorching, too.

“Well-”  
  


“No one. Not important. Right, Wade?” you plaster on a smile, fiddling with the fork in your hand before letting it float in the air. “Want the rest of my ramen? I’m not very hungry.”

“Uh, yeah, sure.”

“Catch,” you say, flinging the fork at him telepathically. He gasps sharply, but his reflexes are quick enough to grab it.

You get up, and notice Ellie looks a bit… gloomier than usual.

“Everything okay?” you ask, and she nods, her lips twitching into a small smile for you before quickly concealing the expression.

“Yeah, I’m alright. ‘Kio and I missed you at lunch, that’s all.”

“Well, I was, uh… Hanging out with Wade. Like you saw,” you explain.

“You didn’t seem very happy. He didn’t say anything to bother you, did he?”

“Oh, uh, no. I was just a bit stressed. Exams coming up and all that.”

“Exams are a couple months away,” Ellie reminds you. “But you were stressed, weren’t you? Look, if you’re having regrets, whatever, fine. I wouldn’t be happy about it and neither would Yukio, but you have a right to your feelings. Just don’t fucking lie to me, okay?”  
  


“I- I promise it’s not about that. Really, I’m… Happy to be with you guys.”

“Then what is it? Seriously?”

You stiffen, you can tell she’s getting angry. Your heart feels like a stone in your chest, cracked and heavy.

“It’s nothing,” you say, not meeting her eyes.

“Alright. Keep your secrets, then,” Ellie sighs, walking away. You head to your room, locking the door behind you. Most students with telepathic abilities get their own rooms in an effort to avoid accidental harm of their fellow students. This was the case for you, and you used to like it.

But then, you met Ellie and Yukio. The two of them were already dating when you were officially introduced, and you became fast friends with them. It quickly evolved into more, and the three of you became what many refer to as a “throuple.”

The facet of the insecurity Wade so rudely talked of earlier was, of course, the fact that they were roommates, and you were alone every night. They got to cuddle and kiss and you got to watch ASMR.

It was depressingly lonely. Sure, every once in awhile you could get away with sleeping over on weekends. But, most of the time, the teachers monitored the rooms, making sure everyone was where they were supposed to be, in case of emergency.

But, wait, there’s more!

As mentioned previously, Ellie is the sun. Yukio is the moon. What are you in that?

And it didn’t help that you were still struggling to cope with the aftermath of  _her_ , a little over a year later.

Before you began your schooling at Xavier’s, you were friends with a small group of fellow mutants that were slowly drawn together by fate. One of these mutants was a girl. You can’t even bear to think her name.

Back then, you were only telepathically gifted. You hadn’t even  _dreamed_  you would be capable of telekinesis one day.

But she, she had super-strength, and she liked to use it on you. Even when you didn’t want her to.

You were defenseless.

You shake, pulling your knees to your chest.

“Hey, why’s the door locked? I thought we were all gonna work together on our art projects.” Yukio’s bright voice is muffled by the door.

“Uh, um, yeah, yeah, I’ll be there in a, um, sec,” you say, your breathing growing heavier and more fast-paced. “Actually, uh, you- you and Ellie sh…sh-should just go and, uh, go work on your projects t-together. I’ll- Yeah, I’ll, uh, figure mine out eventually.”  _Shit, I’m doing a terrible job at covering this up._

“You okay in there, bunny?” It was a cute nickname that Yukio liked to call both you and Ellie.

“Mmhmm, yeah. Just a bit, uh,  _very_  tired. Gonna take a nap soon.”

“Okay…” she says, and you know she doubts you.  _Failure._

“On second thought, uh, I’ll just go to bed early tonight. Let’s get to work,” you decide, unlocking and opening the door.

Upon opening the door, you notice Wade behind them.

“Didn’t realize you took Art, Wade.”

“You also didn’t realize that we planned for  _you_  to come to  _our_  room. You were supposed to show up twenty minutes ago, actually. So, we went to talk to Wade. Since you tell  _him_  everything these days,” Ellie says, pure bitterness in the mention of Wade. It wasn’t that she hated him. She hated that you told him and not her. Not even Yukio, who she’d admit was far more approachable than her.

“Sorry, kid,” he says. “They had a right to know.”

“You- You didn’t tell them about- About…” You feel your eyes widen, alarm racing through you slowly and quickly at the same time.

“No, not that. Not her. Just the other stuff.”

“Oh.”

“ _Her_?” Ellie asks. “Cheating on us, seriously?”

“No,” you say, and it comes out as a whimper due to her angry tone. “I- I- This was a bad idea, Wade. You guys should just go, all three of you, I don’t feel well, I’m tired, I-”

“I’m gonna leave you kids to sort this out,” Wade tells you three. “Good luck.” He slowly backs away.

“Can you close the door?” Yukio asks, and you jolt, door slamming in Wade’s face.

“Yeah,” you say afterwards. This was becoming less stressful thinking and more panic attack by the moment.

“You’ve been avoiding us lately,” Yukio points out. “Wade already told us why, but… I want to hear it from you, ‘kay?”

“It’s nothing, I-” You take a careful, ragged breath, sitting on your bed. Yukio sits on the stool at your desk, and Ellie leans her back against the door. “I just don’t fit. I’ve never fit in anywhere, and I never will. All I’ve done trying is bother others. Especially Ellie and you.”

“You don’t fit?” Ellie asks. “What the fuck do you mean?”

“I- You’re the sun…Yukio’s the moon… And I’m just… _I’m Pluto._ ” The last bit comes out as a shaky whisper. A large, hot tear rolls down your cheek swiftly.

“What?! No! No, bunny, you’re- You’re…” Yukio kneels in front of you, swiping your tear away with her thumb and keeping your sad face in her hand. “I can’t think of anything, but you’re not Pluto, baby.”

“The eclipse. You’re the eclipse, Y/N. Everything aligning perfectly so that we can be together,” Ellie says thoughtfully. “Is that all? You feel like you don’t have a place here, with us? You do. You’re what makes this whole thing work, okay? Now please,  _please_  tell me you didn’t cheat on us for validation.”

“The  _her_  comment, right…” you say, the temporary relief you felt by Ellie’s original statement subsiding. “No. I didn’t cheat, I  _swear_. I’d never do that to you guys, to  _anyone_. I… The last relationship I had before you guys was, um… Not the greatest. It was around a year ago, a little more. Before Xavier’s. Before I honed my abilities. There was a girl, a mutant like me. Like us. But she, uh… She had super-strength. And I wasn’t very physically strong, I was pretty weak, actually. So… You can probably see where I’m going with this, or I hope you do, because I don’t like talking about it, not at-” You finally dissolve into tears. “ _Not at all…_ ”

Ellie rushes towards you to embrace you, and you flinch reflexively.

“I’m sorry. I was  _really_  thoughtless. Just now and for most of our interactions today,” Ellie admits. “I’m just… Things between me and ‘Kio weren’t the greatest, but we were trying because we knew we were meant to be together. And then you came along, and everything made sense. Everything finally fit together, perfectly. And- And I don’t wanna lose that.  _Ever_.”

“Same here,” Yukio agrees. “You’re so great, Y/N. Wade said that you feel really lonely all by yourself in here. Maybe we should try to get you transferred to our room. Sometimes they let people room in groups of three, and they probably could use the extra room.”

“Yeah, but… It’d be kind of annoying to have me tagging along all the time,” you remind her.

Ellie’s eye twitches. “Tagging…Along?”

“That’s the phrase, isn’t it?” you ask.

She takes a deep, calming breath, and you watch her fingers move as she counts to ten on them silently. They’re both sitting with you on the bed, now.

“Ah-” Ellie clenches her teeth, hissing for a moment, as if she’s in pain. “Y/N, you’re just as much a part of this relationship as Yukio and I. What part of that is so hard for you to understand?”

“I- I don’t know. It’s just hard to believe. I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

“What shoes? There are no shoes here,” Yukio tells you. “I really only wear them because it’s frowned upon not to, and because if I didn’t then I’d pick up all sorts of nasty germs.”

Ellie nods in agreement. “Same.”

You sigh, knowing there’s no way to convince them of how worthless you are to the relationship. Maybe because to them, you aren’t?

“Hey, did you see that? I saw that. I think it’s clicking, ‘Kio.”

“I  _did_  see it,” Yukio agrees, and you smile a little at their antics, shaking your head. “Let me go to the office and get the room transfer forms. I’d love to stay, but I think you two cuties need to talk a bit… In private.”

Yukio exits.

“I’m…Sorry. For talking to Wade and not you guys. I shouldn’t have-”  
  


“You’re allowed to confide in your friend. I shouldn’t have taken it as personally as I did. I just know there was a time, before we all got together romantically, where you would’ve talked to me or Yukio about something if it stressed you out that much. But I guess not… We didn’t know about her.”

“It’s just hard to even think about. I feel so ashamed all the time, I’m really sorry that I didn’t-”

“ _Seriously_. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to, and I feel seriously shitty that I was such an asshole about it. You have a right to privacy, as long as you’re not putting anyone or anything in danger. But, the anyone and anything includes you. Okay?”

“Okay,” you respond, and Ellie kisses your forehead, her dark brown eyes looking to yours before she places the softest kiss on your lips, carefully holding your face as if you were priceless and she didn’t want to risk breaking you. You lean into her, forehead on her shoulder.

“Let’s lay down. I owe you some cuddling. I hear I’m an excellent big spoon,” she tells you.

“From a biased source. Let’s try the sweetheart’s cradle,” you offer.

“What the fuck is the sweetheart’s cradle?”

“Honestly, I did far too much research into the perfect cuddle position, for the time it might actually happen.”  
  


“We don’t really cuddle, do we? Yukio hasn’t really given you any cuddles either, has she? Wow, you’re really missing out- …Oh. I’m so sorry,” Ellie apologizes, looking more heartbroken than determined with this one. She hadn’t realized the extent to which you were being neglected by them. “I’m sorry, doll. Really sorry.”

“Doll? That’s new,” you comment.

“I figured you deserved a petname of your own,” Ellie informs you. “Now, explain this ‘sweetheart’s cradle’ to me."


End file.
